School holidays at Kia Kaha primary school

It is the school holidays at Kia Kaha primary school! 

There is so much you can do in the school holidays.

You can fly to Wellington. Or the Gold Coast.
Or you can stay at home and not even drive to Hamilton because it costs so much to fill the car now.
You can go to McDonalds for a treat.
Or you can sit down to dinner and say,
What is that. Is that like an actual snail? OMG mum, have you like totally lost it?

There is just so much you can do in the holidays,
even when it is July.

Or you can just sleep for days and days.
Ms Barry is sleeping.
Ms Barry is very tired. 

Moana’s family is flying to Wellington!
Moana’s mum says,
You swap with me Moana,
I’ll sit next to this man who has chosen not to wear a mask.
She is using the voice Ms Barry does sometimes if she is not very impressed with somebody.

It is very windy.
The plane is going up and down.
The plane is going sideways.
The plane is going up and down and sideways.

Moana thinks everyone on the plane has gone quiet.
But it is hard to tell because there is so much noise from going up and down and sideways.

Now they are on the ground!
It is good to be on the ground in Wellington and not going up and down and sideways.

Moana’s family is driving to Brooklyn. 
They will be staying with Moana’s Mum’s friend Caitlin. 

It is very windy on the drive.
Moana says,
Dad, look someone has parked their car on a rock by the harbour.
Moana says,
Oh look, there are three more.
Is that how people park their cars here, Dad?
The Uber driver uses the windscreen wiper to push away bits of wing mirror and rubbish bins that keep hitting the windscreen.

Moana’s family is in Brooklyn!
Everyone is hugging! 

Moana tells Caitlin,
We were in the scariest plane ride ever, Caitlin.

Caitlin waves her arm at the weather outside the window and says,
Oh this is nothing!

This is a thing that Wellington people will say if you are silly enough to mention you didn't like your flight.

They will say 
Once we came in upside down and I just went on painting my nails. 
We don't make a fuss about it here. 

Caitlin tells Moana, 
Once we came in upside down and I just went on painting my nails. 
We don't make a fuss about it here.

Moana is not sure she would like to live in Wellington.

Ms Barry is sleeping.
Ms Barry is very tired. 

Madison’s family is not going away.
They are having renovations. 
There will be an Italian kitchen with Swedish lighting and a Japanese bathroom with Danish lighting and German hardware and a lot of cedar.

Madison’s Mum is not very happy.
The renovations have already cost four times as much as they were supposed to.
Madison’s Dad explains to Madison that there is a war in Ukraine and supply chain issues.
Madison’s Mum says,
Like I said. What did I say? Didn't I say we should wait?
Madison’s Dad says,
Can we not do this now, I think that’s Steve outside.

Steve is the builder.
He was the only one Madison’s Dad could find.
Last week while Steve was having his coffee he told Madison’s Mum the world was created 6,000 years ago, including the dinosaurs and everything.
Then he started telling her some other things they talk about at his church.
So Madison’s Mum had to pretend she had to go to the vet.

Madison’s Dad says,
Why don't you message Saskia and see if she wants to come over?
Saskia's family is having a lovely holiday in Bali.
But Madison doesn't want to set anything off. 
She says,
No they’ve got the ‘Rona Dad.

Ms Barry is sleeping.
Ms Barry is very tired. 

Amelia is looking out the window.
Her Mum is digging up something in the garden.
She wonders if it has something to do with what her Dad was getting all excited about this morning.

He was reading out a story from the newspaper that said 

With food prices spiralling,
the cost of petrol and power soaring, and interest rates rising,
New Zealanders are pooling tips to survive the cost of living crisis.

And then it said 

Weeds, garden snails and even roadkill
are on the menu for more radical fans of frugality,
who may also do without toilet paper,
take cold showers,
or eat other people’s leftovers.

Amelia’s Dad comes out from the bathroom and says,
You know what, we're going to save a fortune Amelia.

He says,
Some woman on Aussie TV was making fun of us
but we’ll see who has the last laugh at dinner tonight.

The woman on TV had made it sound like everyone was eating snails and the rest of the gross stuff because the cost of living in New Zealand has got so terrible.

Sometimes a person on TV says something like that so they will get asked back on TV.
Even though they know it's not really right.

Sometimes a person on TV says something like that because they are the kind of person who says,
If it’s Covid 19 obviously there have been 18 others.

On Breakfast TV you can never be quite sure which kind of person it is.

It is dinner time.
Amelia sits down and looks at her plate
Amelia says,
What is that?
Is that like an actual snail? 
OMG Mum have you like totally lost it?

Ms Barry is sleeping.
Ms Barry is very tired. 

Patrick and Zac and Jordan are in Patrick’s Dad’s Ranger.
They are going to McDonald's for a treat.
They have been in the drive-in queue for 20 minutes.

Patrick says,
Hey Dad, you know how before you sat on the horn behind that cyclist?

Patrick's Dad says,
Yeah did you see how she bricked herself when I let rip?
Crackup eh?

Patrick says,
Was it because she was holding us up?

Patrick's Dad says,
Bloody right it was.
Think they own the road, woke virtue signallers

Patrick says,
I was wondering.
How long do you think she held us up?
Like 10 seconds?

Patrick's Dad says,
I bloody wouldn't be surprised.

Patrick says,
It's just we've been waiting 20 minutes now and you haven't got on the horn at all.

It is quiet in the cab now.

After about a minute Patrick's Dad says,
What's that Barry woman been telling you kids now?
Is it some bullshit about the so-called heatwave in Europe?

Ms Barry is sleeping.
Ms Barry is very tired.