Halfway up a historic tower in York, we are neither up nor down. At the top you will have views of a city steeped in antiquity, made and remade by Romans, Normans, Vikings, Tescos.

Below, you will find a retired minister happy to tell you all about this most astonishing of cathedrals, and who will pick up your accent and want to quiz you about the fine details of the Brokenwood Mysteries. Everywhere here if they pick up your accent they say something about lamb or your Prime Minister. Sheβs so great, they will tell you.

But halfway up the tower in York Minster I took this photo of flies. At each of the little slits of windows there is a clutch of them trying to get out. Halfway up, neither up nor down, going nowhere. Yes I am indeed constructing a metaphor in gold letters ten feet high.