It is an exciting day at Kia Kaha Primary School.
Room 13 is going to visit Artichoke Real Estate!
They have been invited by Gerry Artichoke.
Gerry Artichoke is the Principal of Artichoke Real Estate.
It is different from being the Principal of Kia Kaha Primary School.
It is different because you can make a lot more money in real estate.
Gerry Artichoke has invited Room 13 to come to Artichoke Real Estate and learn about Getting Ahead.
He is doing this even though he will not be getting paid any money.
This is something people who have a lot of money call Giving Back.
This is not the only thing Artichoke Real Estate does to Give Back.
Artichoke Real Estate also pays for an advertisement in each Kia Kaha school newsletter.
It also sponsors a prize at the school prize giving each year for Excellence in the Fields of Excellence And Saturday Morning Footy.
The children are walking in a crocodile to Artichoke Real Estate.
Ms Barry says,
Itās a better idea than going in a bus what with all the Covid and everything and besides the walk will do us all good.
Ms Barry has been saying The walk will do us all good a lot since the Covid came.
Room 13 is at Artichoke Real Estate!
Hello Ms Barry,
says Mr Artichoke,
I wonāt ask if you've got the syphilis.
This a joke Mr Artichoke is making about getting vaccinated.
Ms Barry pretends to laugh.
Good morning boys and girls,
says Mr Artichoke,
Iām going to talk to you today about getting ahead. Can anyone tell me what the best way is to get ahead?
Amelia puts up her hand. She says,
Go to university and get a degree?
Caleb puts up his hand. He says,
Be an All Black?
Moana puts up her hand. She says,
Buy a digger and a ute?
Mr Artichoke says,
No, none of those. Anyone else?
Moana puts up her hand again and says,
Get a degree and marry an All Black with a digger and a ute?
The children all laugh.
Mr Artichoke shakes his head and says,
Sorry no. Anyone else?
No-one has their hand up now.
Mr Artichoke says,
The best way to get ahead is to buy a house. A house can make you more money than a job with a degree or being an All Black or even a digger business. And all you have to do is buy it and wait.
And do you know what the best bit of all is?
No-one puts their hand up.
Mr Artichoke says,
The best bit of all is you don't have to wait until you have the money to buy a house, you can borrow it from the bank and buy the house now before the price goes up.
Mr Artichoke says,
Do you know what the other best bit is?
No-one puts their hand up.
Mr Artichoke says,
The price keeps going up, so whatever you pay today, it will be more next year, so you will have made all that money just from buying a house and waiting.
Thomas asks,
But what if you don't make enough money at your job to pay it back?
Mr Artichoke says,
Well all that will happen is in a few years you'll see a better house you like so youāll buy that one and your own house will have gone up so much in price youāll be able to pay back the money you borrowed and youāll just borrow again to buy the new one.
Thomas is trying to make sense of what Mr Artichoke has told him.
He says,
But I don't understand, do you mean the bank will just keep giving you more? Where does the money actually come from?
Mr Artichoke says,
Look all I know is I've been in real estate for thirty five years and the bank always has money to lend and the price keeps going up and it never changes, so no-one needs to worry.
Amelia looks worried. She says,
But my mum told me that to buy a house these days you have to come up with like twenty times what you earn in a year and once upon a time you only had to pay like three times what you earn in a year so itās just too hard and even the deposit is too much unless you can get help.
Mr Artichoke says,
Look all you need to know is you just have to get on the property ladder as soon as you can. And once you do you should get a second and a third and seventh house as well and put tenants in.
Anna says in a quiet voice,
My mum says that's what we are, tenants, and we pay more for rent than Aunty Susan does for a mortgage. It makes her cry.
Mr Artichoke says,
Sweetie, you tell her I said she should come and see me. I reckon if we try hard enough we can get her into a unit.
Kyle asks,
But if the prices keep going up, won't the bank run out of money?
Mr Artichoke says,
All I know is Iāve been in this game forever and they never have.
Kyle asks,
But isnāt it better for us to be making things than buying and selling houses?
Mr Artichoke says,
Look maybe you should visit the bank manager next door. Angelaās a top sort. I bet sheāll have the answers for you. You young shavers are a bit sharp for me this morning.
And he winks at them.
Ms Barry says,
Yes letās visit the bank.
It is nice to leave the real estate office.
It is nice to breathe fresh air instead of Mr Artichokeās aftershave.
It is very handy to be in a special part of town where there is a bank branch that has not been closed.
Amelia's Dad is coming out of the bank holding a folder. He looks very sad.
Amelia runs to hug her Dad but he says not now Amelia and keeps walking.
Angela the Bank Manager says,
Good morning Room 13, what would you like to know?
Ms Barry says,
Maybe you could just tell us how money lending works.
Angela says,
Sure, well, what we do is someone comes in and says I want to buy a house and we say have you got your deposit and can you show us something that proves you will earn the money to pay us every month and that there will be no risk for us whatsoever? And as long as you can do that we will lend you whatever the price is for your house. We made a billion dollars last year doing that. Pretty cool eh kids.
Thomas asks,
What else do you lend money for?
Angela the Manager looks puzzled.
She asks,
What do you mean?
Thomas says,
Well like if someone has a business idea, how do they borrow money from you?
Angela the manager still looks puzzled.
She says,
That's not really how it works. I mean we had someone in here just now wanting us to lend him money for some software business and he didn't have any customers at all yet, just an armful of pages in a folder and well I mean LOL, what does he think we are?
I told him what we tell everyone who comes in here: have you got a house you can mortgage and do you have a regular salary we can rely on? No? Then come back when you do.
Thomas goes to put up his hand but then takes it down again.
Thomas is going to win the Excellence in the Fields of Excellence prize next month because he knows when it is a waste of time to ask someone a question.
The crocodile is walking home again now.
Amelia looks at a big house with a lawn and says to Ms Barry,
I wish we lived in a place like that Miss.
Ms Barry looks at Amelia kindly and says,
Do you know who else said that when he was your age, walking past a fancy house in Christchurch, Amelia?
It was John Key. His family didn't have much money at all but he ended up living in lovely houses because he got a degree and got a job buying and selling money to people and then he became Prime Minister and ā¦...
Ms Barry has stopped talking before the end of her sentence.
The children know when Ms Barry stops before the end of her sentence that she has remembered the story has an unhappy ending.
Amelia doesn't say anything.
Ms Barry looks ahead down the road and says to the Crocodile,
Anyway the walk back to school will do us all good.
